The Danger of a Broken Lens

Examine your lens today!

My in-depth study of Ephesians has brought me to my knees several times. The lies we believe about ourselves and about God can and will put us in bondage. I'm passionate about reminding people of their identity in Christ. We all need to be reminded (that was in essence what Paul was doing when he wrote Ephesians) that we are a new creation.

What we believe about God is crucial because it affects what we believe about everything else. A distorted or damaged view of God will distort the way we see just about everything and everyone around us.

It makes sense. I believe that often times we fail to realize that what is causing the irritation and turmoil with our souls is not necessarily the people or the circumstances we think are annoying us; rather, the problem just might be that we are seing things trhough a damaged lens.

One of those areas that is particular impacted by our view of God ironically is our view of ourselves. If we don't see God as He really is - if we believe things about Him that are not true - invariably, we will have a distored view of ourselves. Which is why Ephesians is chock-full of reminders of who God is.

Is the storm in your life overwhelming you right now? Do you feel worthless? Reexamine your view of God. If we have constructed in our minds a god who is weak and impotent and not in control of every detail of the universe, we might just be seeing ourselves as being helpless and most likely will be overwhelmed by the storms and circumstances that surround us.

HE is:
He is holy, He is good, He is faithful, He is eternal, He is forgiving, He is full of grace and mercy, He is righteous, He is sovereign, He is love...this is truth!

Our view of God can be distorted if we are not pursuing a personal relationship with Him, not reading His Word to get to know Him, and believing lies about Him because we are only looking at circumstances and irritations around us, all these can cause us to see Him through a broken lens.

If we have believed lies about God, we will most likely believe lies about ourselves.

I have some very special people in my life who truly struggle with seeing themselves as God sees them. (This is one of the reasons I am determined to pour into my own children reminders of who they are in Christ - if we tell them over and over again when they are young, they hopefully will remember it when they are older).

I think that some of these special people in my life determine their sense of worth by the input and opinions of others. Sometimes input can be helpful and accurate, but not always. If, for some reason, the person we are listening to is looking through a defective lens, his or her vision will be distorted. Some of us have lived all our lives in an emotional prison beause we have accepted what a broken mirror said to us about ourselves.

Please remember how powerful your words are. One simple sentence heard as a child can haunt a person for years. Likewise, one simple word of encouargement can empower a person for life as well.

I use to teach a class on interviewing skills and making yourself marketable. I had this one particular student in both my keyboarding class and this interviewing class. In keyboarding, I would tell her often what a great speller she was because her timed writings were fast and accurate. So, one day while I was video taping her mock interview, when asked what her strengths were, she said with confidence, "Well, I'm a great speller!"  You see, ask my boys to describe themselves. I know exactly what they will say...because we have been very intentional in speaking life into them over and over again!

Check the lens you've been looking through!

Don't let others determine your worth! 1 Peter shows us how Jesus' sense of worth was determined, not by what others thought of Him, but by the Truth as expressed by His heavenly Father; "He was rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to Him." We too are chosen by God and precious to Him!!

I remember having value explained to me by asking if it is possible that someone who did not recognize or appreciate fine art would toss a masterpieces into the trash. Would that make the art any less valuable? NO. The true worth of the art would be seen when an art collector spotted it and said, "That is a priceless piece, and I'm willing to pay any amount to acquire it."

When God sent His only Son, Jesus, to earth to bear our sin on the cross, He put a price tag on us - He declared the value of our soul to be greater than the value of the whole world.

Take the mirror that God has given you...and look again.  You see, His lens is NEVER BROKEN!

Nothing!

I absolutely LOVE the Word of God. Romans 8:38-39 is a powerful scripture that reminds us that there is NOTHING that can separate us from the LOVE of God. Too many people feel like they've done way too much for God to ever give them a second chance, or that they've used up all of their "2nd chances"! I think the Message Bible puts this scripture in just the right way...for everyone to understand what it is saying. So, I've simply copied this scripture from the Message for you and I to read:

So, what do you think? 

With God on our side like this, how can we lose?

If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us? 

And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen? 

Who would dare even to point a finger? 

The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. 

Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! 

Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture: 

They kill us in cold blood because they hate you. We’re sitting ducks; they pick us off one by one. None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. 

I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.

Powerful right? You shouldn't have any doubts about whatever situation you are in...He's not letting go of you...at all! Nothing is going to get in His way of LOVING you and me!

OH how He loves us & NOTHING is going to hold Him back!

The Dark Place

 

Photo by tiverylucky @ freedigitalphotos.net

This week we talked a lot about freedom. Freedom because of the men and women who fought and continue to fight on our country's behalf. What about our Freedom in Christ? Everywhere I look I'm seeing captivity.  My heart is so burdened for my friends who are believing lies today. That's what it boils down to, believing lies and choosing not to renounce the words that others have spoken over them.

A few years ago, my pastor came to my home, having heard what had been done to me before he even came to pastor our church. He came to renounce the lies spoken about me, and replace the curse with blessing. Around my dining room table he petitioned Heaven on my behalf and spoke words of blessing and truth! That spoke volumes to my soul. I hadn't realized up until that point the real power behind words.

I realize now why God has been calling me to study our identity in Christ - so many people in my life are struggling right now. I just wrote "Who Am I?" a week ago...explaining the truth about how God sees us. 

Now, if we are in His Word, writing down the truth on index cards and on our hearts - repeating it to ourselves daily we will start to actually believe it. Then because thoughts become actions, our daily lives will testify what we really believe about ourselves.

Here is the truth - GOD cannot lie!! So if He says something about you....believe it!

I've been there before. I lived most of my youth believing things about me that were not true. I even believed lies as an adult, gosh....a few months ago. I probably still believe lies!! However, I have learned to renounce those words that don't line up with God's Word. I have asked God to give me the ability to recognize and believe the truth. My reality isn't necessarily God's reality! OK, so I'm most likely an optimistic person. I've been studying joy also, so I'm thinking that is helpful.

The number one enemy of JOY is FEAR/ANXIETY. Why do we believe lies about ourselves? Why do we dwell on the negative...FEAR. That is why we need to learn to pull the truth out of God's Word! I promise...it will set you FREE! 

In the past two days this is what I've heard from various people in my life: If any of this resonates with you...renounce the condemning words with truth!

I'm a failure. (Well, perhaps you have failed today at something, perhaps you got or done something wrong today, you've made a mistake)...THIS DOES NOT DEFINE YOU!   
You are actually God's workmanship (Eph. 2:10) (He doesn't EVER fail or make failures!)
You are free from condemnation (Romans 8:1)

I'm unlovable! (You think that no one wants you because you've been alone. Perhaps you think something must be wrong with you.)....THIS DOES NOT DEFINE YOU!  
You are actually tenderly loved by God (Jeremiah 31:3) and you are a sweet fragrance of Christ to God. (2 Corinth 2:15)

I have no friends! (You may not be going out every night. Maybe you don't get the phone calls you thought you'd be getting. Perhaps you've not been invited to hang out with "the others".) Investigate here...are you reaching out to others? ....regardless...THIS DOES NOT DEFINE YOU!  
You're a member of Christ's body (1 Corinth. 12:27) 
You're Christ's friend (John 15:5)...

I'm not being used by God! (Perhaps your time to operate your gifts has not happened yet. His timing is perfect by the way. Also, I've learned...be faithful in the little things)...either way...remember -  
You have been established, anointed, and sealed by God (2 Corinthians 1:21:22) and 
You are God's coworker (2 Corinthians 6:1, 1 Corinthians 3:9)

These are just a few things...but enough to bring some so far down to almost depression. Listen, the enemy loves to have a field day with our minds. If he can get you to doubt...he will be thrilled!

I implore you - READ THE WORD - and ask God to help with unbelief!! Of course my friends that have mentioned these things don't read my blog. That's ok, I've already said ALL of this to their faces.

Pray with one another. Call someone to pray for you. DO NOT get stuck in that dark place of self pity and anxiety/fear. If you're thinking too much of yourself and your life (what it is or isn't)..that is another thing that will rob you of your JOY.

God is faithful. Be confident in this, that the good work that God has begun in you WILL be perfected!

Who Am I?

Teaching my boys about their identity in Christ!

In the past I've mentioned that I use to struggle with my identity. It's true. When I was a child, I was "Lisa Tulli/Sine (Sine was my adopted name, Tulli my Mother's maiden name) unplanned, intruder, the cause of my mother's death, average, ugly girl." These were the things I was told, things that others perceived me to be, things that sadly I started to believe myself. No worries - my early childhood was rough for sure, but...I was rescued!

As a young married woman, in New Jersey I was "Lisa Engel, teacher, speaker, woman who spent 10 years struggling with infertility and loss..." and finally when I moved to Florida 10 years ago I was simply "Lisa Engel, Mom of 3 boys under the age of 2".

It's a puzzle of who God says he is - unique and perfectly fitting!

You see the problem. While much of these "identities" are based on truth in my life, they are NOT who I am, they are more of what I've done or possess, what I've been through, or even what I'm perceived to be. None of those things is who I am! 

Today I no longer struggle! I'm confident in my identity because I understand what it is to have my identity in Christ. The more time I spend with Him the more I become aware of His nature, and the more I want to be like Him. I'm His! 

He fashioned me to be simply Lisa! Simply me!

Who am I in Christ? What does that mean anyway? Here it is...and its all found in His Word:

I'm forgiven. I'm greatly loved. I'm adopted! I'm chosen! I'm God's favorite (blessed and highly favored)! I'm fearfully and wonderfully made! I'm the head and not the tail! I'm redeemed, healed, a new creation! I'm MORE than a conqueror! I'm firmly rooted! I'm built up! I'm alive! I'm FREE! I'm loved unconditionally! I'm a child of a King! An heir to the throne...from royalty! I could go on and on and on and on! 

 

Indeed God's favorite - don't let anyone tell you differently!

Now, if you really believe all these things that are actually found in His Word....and you make a habit of reminding yourself of these truths about your identity. YOU WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!

He's refining me everyday! I know not everyone will like it, but I don't have to worry for one second about that - because HE loves it! I use to worry about what others thought. In fact there are people who have a problem with me being me, me being full of joy, confident and using the gifts God has given me. They've so much as told me so. At one point this hurt me so much! I understand now that is their issue...not mine! They can take it up with my Maker! Listen, He doesn't make mistakes!  Don't let others or the world mold you into something - you already have a Creator for that!

Absolutely, I'm in LOVE with my LORD!

Lastly remember, these are not to make you proud! I laugh because it really couldn't make us proud, we've had nothing to do with these things. It's all about the One who created us! These are because of Him. You and I are who we are in Christ because HE made us in His image! We had NOTHING to do with it! That is why we can be confident and not cocky!  

Finally, all these things are true. It doesn't become void because we've doubted it, or because we've messed up. If you are a child of God, if you accepted His free gift of salvation through Jesus Christ, if you have partaken of His Grace...His Amazing Grace...than these things are true of you! 

If you've never made a decision to give God a chance, guess what these things are true of you too. There is a man or woman of God (created in the very image of God) inside of you longing to rise up! The only barrier standing in the way, is your unbelief. If you know that you are a sinner (we were born in sin), and you believe that Jesus Christ was God's only Son sent to die for your sins (He paid the penalty for us - shed His blood, so we could be saved), and you if would accept His free gift of salvation - you could remove that barrier - and you too could be confident today that you are indeed all that the Word says you are in Christ! 

I would love to help you with any questions you may have. You can leave a comment, or message me. I'm excited! 

Listen, I cannot stress enough....SPEND TIME WITH YOUR CREATOR! He knows you best! As you spend time in His presence (talk with the Lord, pray, listen, sing...just be)  you start to talk like Him, smell like Him, act like Him. It's true! Try it...I dare you! 

He Ain't Heavy...

Brendan and Kyle...I love this picture so much...says so much about their relationship.

He's my brother. We've heard the song, if you haven't check it out...it was made famous by The Hollies in the mid 70s. I know, I'm dating myself. So years ago,when my sweet Kyle was first diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (PDD-NOS) I got myself in a support group where I felt right at home. These people understood me and my world. It was comfortable and I learned a great deal from others who have walked down this road.

Today, I don't have a support group and some say I don't need one. Truly, most every adult I know...absolutely loves my boy, and really cannot see any "special needs". I'm so thankful - he has come a long way!! We see it all, we see what others don't. I've turned to writing as my way of wrestling with the raw feelings that really only others who have walked this path can truly understand. Perhaps if you haven't had to walk this path, you will run into someone who is and can be a source of encouragement.

Twins!

I have written quite a bit about Kyle. My oldest (by 2 minutes). I have written about the fact that I once prayed for healing...and realized that God made no mistakes when He created Kyle - the healing came in me. I would love for him not to struggle socially or academically, but honestly...the boy shows me Jesus all the time.  Tonight the boys came home and once again I am sitting here with a huge lump in my throat. I do feel for my boy and his challenges and Mr. Incredible and I work hard at trying to give him tools to help him work out those "issues", but it is getting more difficult now that hormones are getting involved, not to mention he is just getting smarter. He knows things now that he wasn't aware of before...and it is starting to hurt.

The lump that is in my throat has to do with his twin brother, Brendan. As we talked about what happened during the car ride tonight Brendan looked at me with tears in his eyes and explained to me that people do look at Kyle differently. People do raise eyebrows and people can be rude to him. Brendan says that often he will step in as his brother and explain "My brother has a form of Autism...he can't help it." He told me that most of the time, almost all of the time, people get it and understand. He said to me with a tear in the corner of his eye, "Mom, if people would just get to know him they would love him and accept him!"

This is why I am purposeful to teach them the truth about who they are in Christ!

Who Christ says he is!!

Then he asked me if I thought the Lord might heal Kyle, if I still pray for his healing like I use to. I haven't prayed for his healing. I guess I pray for his challenges and that he would be an overcomer...but I love him so much and often think...he is this way for a reason.  Most people do understand and most people love him. It is this age, 13 years olds, it is a weird phase, and boys this age...can be hurtful without even knowing it. We try to explain to Kyle that some of the things he does...can annoy people. You see he tries so hard to fit in, to make people laugh. Sometimes, if he feels even a bit uncomfortable he will resort to trying to be funny...that is his way of feeling better in social situations.

My pain is for Brendan, who at the age of six tells me..."Mom, don't worry, when you die my wife and I will take care of Kyle." Who says that at age six? Today, he hurts for his brother. He hurts when his friends act impatient and rude to him. He carries a burden that I never ever wanted him to have to carry.

Kyle feeding Brendan!

I told him tonight that I am so thankful that Kyle has him as a brother. He is an amazing kid with a incredible heart! He told me right back..."I'm glad I have Kyle...I love him Mom!" I really feel like Brendan doesn't feel like it is a burden. Like the song says...

"The road is long, with many a winding turn that leads us to who knows where. Who knows when, but I'm strong -  strong enough to carry him. He ain't heavy, he's my brother.

So on we go, his welfare is of my concern. No burden is he to bear, we'll get there. For I know he would not encumber me. He ain't heavy, he's my brother.

If I'm laden at all I'm laden with sadness, that everyone's heart isn't filled with the gladness of love for one another. It's a long, long road from which there is no return. While we're on the way to there why not share and the load doesn't weigh me down at all. He ain't heavy, he's my brother."

I can not even put into words how much I love this boy. How thankful I am for his heart for the Lord and for his family. He has stepped in an intervened on so many occasions. His precious heart hurts for his brother and being 12 years old himself...I'm sure he doesn't know how to deal with it all the time. I'm in my mid 40s and I don't even know. I'm glad that Kyle has found some new friends at our new church. They seem to love him and truly make him feel like he belongs.

Brendan absolutely loves his brothers. He would gladly carry them, wherever, whenever! Kyle and Shane just don't know how incredibly blessed they are to have Brendan in their lives. I pray someday they will! I pray that someday they will appreciate that they are amazing brothers...my true superheros.

He ain't heavy, he's my brother!

This is the perfect set of pictures! There is my sweet Brendan...pushing his brothers...and smiling the whole time! "He ain't heavy, he's my brother!"  I love you son....more than my words or actions could ever express! I'm so thankful you are in my life my sweet superhero!

Intimacy Only Found In Quiet

Me, in 1973 - I was 4 years old, but that is still me. There is a little girl/boy in each of us!

I try the best I can to express the necessity of quiet time. We tend to often find so many other things to get in our way, or perhaps we feel like we don't know what to do in this...quiet time.

I haven't been blogging lately. Hoping that changes. However, I have completed a book that is presently with the editor. That has taken up much of my creativity and writing time. No matter how busy I can be, the one thing I know that is necessary is my time with my Creator.

We don't have to spend our quiet time the same way or at the same time. That would be silly, you and I are very different. Sometimes I will close my eyes before I read anything, and just listen. Sometimes, I will start out with simple words of praise (HE is worthy of all praise). Then there are times, when I start off, much like that little girl excited to see her Daddy and tell him all that is on her heart. I know He's waiting for me....and that makes me smile.

A few weeks back, I sat in my spot and had just finished reading Jeremiah 29:13 "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart I will be found by you,” declares the Lord,.." I closed my eyes and it was as if I were watching a silent movie...let me try and set the stage: I was running, like a little girl, through a thick forest. So many trees of all different sizes. Then I paused, leaned on a tree and almost out of breath I closed my eyes and starting counting...1..2..3..4..5..10..."Ready or not, here I come!" The smile on my face was filled with excitement and anticipation. I ran just a little bit and I see Jesus leaning up as if to hide behind a tree, but instead he was "hiding" IN FRONT of the tree. I laughed and ran up to Him and shouted..."I found You!" He embraced me and we both just laughed! Then I did it again. 1..2..3..4..5..10.."Ready or not, here I come!" This time He had wrapped His arms around the tree, so His hands and feet were clearly visible.

For a moment, I thought my heart could be sad, because that thought of How he allowed His hands and feet to be nailed to a tree briefly entered my heart. But I realized that is just how much He loves me.

So I sneaked up on Him and shouted...I found you! He acted surprised, but I knew He really wasn't. He again wrapped me up in His arms and twirled me around! We walked hand in hand..and played hide and seek again. He was so easy to find every time, because if  you will seek Him, you will always find Him!  Talk about intimacy! I still get teary just thinking about this time I had with my Jesus!

Today I woke at 5:00am. Got into my chair and closed my eyes. This morning I was searching for His gaze. You know that He is always present! I am aware that He dwells inside of me. I'm a part of Him. I want to see myself through His eyes. His gaze is true, steady, sure and untainted by sin. He sees me as one who is loved eternally, deeply, intimately. I find such peace in His presence, in His gaze.

There have been times, for much of my life that I would concentrate on what others saw in me. Others, however, always (to no fault of their own), see me through the filters of their own life and limitations. Christ does not have that problem. You see at one point in my life it was important to me that people liked me. OH the danger in this.

Now that I have come to understand my identity in Christ...I don't struggle with this nearly as much. I once read that the "major problem with letting others define you is that it borders on idolatry." You see, "your concern to please others dampens your desire to please your Creator!"

That is why I need to check in with my Creator every day - so He can remind me who I am in Him. Its a big deal! Not to mention the fact that the more time we spend with Him, the more we know Him and the more time we will want to be with Him. It really works just like that!

We were all created for intimacy. True, glorious, life changing intimacy is most definitely found in our quiet time. Have you had your quiet time today?