|New Smyrna Beach Sunrise - greets me every Monday!|
I'm presently up to 4.89 miles of running (with a 5 minute brisk walking warm up and cool down)....45 minutes of actual running/jogging. Eight weeks ago, I could barely even do 5 minutes of running. So the consistency and conditioning is really working. I love to run.
There is something that happens after the first 15 minutes...you get into your groove..and then there is no stopping you. You feel...amazing! Actually, I feel amazing right now.
Sadly, when you have a weight issue, it is hard to see the differences in your body. Easier sometimes to feel the differences. That is where I am. A few days ago I was running in my neighborhood and I happened to catch a glimpse of my shadow. I just about died. No seriously. I wanted to stop running, sit down on someone lawn and cry. I looked at that shadow and said to myself..."you do not deserve to be running." (I know lies..all lies!) Literally struggled with the fact that even though I felt awesome and was actually doing it...and doing it well, I still had too much weight to lose and someone my size should not be out there running 5 miles a day.
|Riverside Drive run in the rain....dedication!|
So as I ran on the beach this morning (with my new running shoes), I looked at my footprints. I'm not entirely sure why I did that. I did notice however, that it really slowed me down. Stop looking back Lisa! Stop looking at the warped image of a girl who has struggled with weight her entire life. Look forward and the run will go faster, smoother and better! I don't want to even look to the side where I will see my shadow. Just keep my head straight and my body lined up and my feet going forward all the time. I building muscle. I building a life of discipline, a healthy lifestyle for my sons! I honoring God with my body and how I'm doing my best to care for it. I'm not perfect at it. I still have 30 extra pounds that I carry with me every single time I run. (Probably should say that I've lost almost 50 with Weight Watchers so far...still going!) I eat healthy, I exercise, I feel wonderful...but I have that baggage. I don't want to take drops, pills or shakes. I want to live a lifetime with the food that God has provided for me. Will I reach my goal. YES!
I will do it in God's time. Let everything else...it will be the best time...He is preparing me for a lifetime journey. This will not end 30 pounds from now...this will be my life. Might as well enjoy the journey and stop looking back at my footprints!