Just a Small Jar of Oil

When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I - Psalms 61:2

Overwhelmed? I've been studying 2 Kings and I love, absolutely love Elisha. He has taught me so much. As I'm in my 4th week of homeschooling my superheros, perhaps it is my theory of education of homeschooling that gets in my way sometimes, but I have a 7th, 8th and 9th grader now. I'm running a household, running a business, serving at church, keeping up with relationships, trying to stay healthy....life can be overwhelming. (could be why I've not written in a while) :)

I was walking with a friend this morning and we agreed that everyone has issues in their lives that can easily bring them down. It's how we deal with those issues, how we look at our situation, what we focus on.

Whatever stage of life we are in, there are moments when we feel like we are faced with too many responsibilities facing us at every turn, or like we've run out of options and we're doing life on empty. I imagine that is how the lady in 2 Kings 4 felt. With her husband's death, she was in terrible financial trouble. When you think your financial problems are bad, read about this woman, it puts it in perspective. She was desperate, in fear of losing everything she had including her boys - to creditors.

We know the story. She asks Elisha for help, and he asked her what she had to work with and she said nothing! Just this small jar of oil.

Wow! Can you relate? Have you ever been in that place where you don't think you have enough, you feel desperation in your gut...what happens? We tend to focus only on our limitations don't we?

God sees our situations much differently than we do. I promise you, I serve a God that specializes in doing a lot with a little! 

God took one jar of oil and multiplied it so the widow cold pay her debts.

I just felt like someone needed to be encouraged this morning. When you feel like you've run out of options, or you are drowning and feel there is no way out,...remember you have all God needs. He's given you everything you need. Practice gratitude for those things in life that you do have...it totally changes our focus.  It's outrageous faith that Elisah teaches us! I want outrageous faith - I've got all I need and that's all God needs to do miraculous things in my life! Take a moment and write down what you have, what is your small jar of oil? That's all He needs.

Pulling Back The Curtains...Again

borrowed pic from the globaldoorproject.org

Every once in a while I pull back the curtains in my heart to reveal something totally vulnerable, I'm not sure yet if it is for whomever is reading this, or solely for me, either way it is therapeutic and sometimes an occasional reader gets blessed in the aftermath.  This is one of those times when I can't get my thoughts straight, so in order to accomplish any housework, grade papers or bake cookies, I must get this out.

The Lord is working on either refining me or defining me or both. About a year ago He moved me from point A where I was content, to point B where I have found in some ways allowed me to grow. He has a way of moving us...we never want to be stagnant...because then we might start to stink. When I was moved from A to B, at first I felt stripped. Stripped of all that I loved, all that I knew I worked well in, all that was familiar and freeing. But I knew it was for a noble cause. I knew it was not about me at all...it was more about those I love. When love is involved, sacrifice is much easier.

So a door was closed. So closed, that even when I snuck back in for a brief moment, I knew I was not going to be able to go back. I have to accept that when God closes a door, He must be opening up a new one - that's what they say right? The crazy thing is, I think he is teaching me that not all doors have knobs, handles, and windows and they can look and operate very differently.

I'm 45 years old, felt like I've lost something that I'm never gonna recover and I have shed many tears and have even lost sleep because of this transition. I've started to do an in depth study of Psalms 91. Did you know that God promises so much in those 16 verses? The beginning of the chapter gives us one thing to do..."Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty." That's it - choose to dwell in His shelter and rest in His shadow! Well, I do that. I spend time every morning doing just that...and sure enough He is showing me His many promises.

So while I'm running from door to door, while I'm weeping over the fact that "feel" I don't have a "home", He is showing me that I've been narrow minded in thinking that doors have to even be connected to a wall let alone a building. Wow! Mind blown (as my eleven year old would say)! Now don't think for one minute that the enemy isn't just having a heyday with my mind. OH He's such a liar. Thoughts like, are you ready for this?..."You don't fit here. He's not gonna be using your gifts any longer, your time is up. You left your family, now you are alone. These people don't need you or really even want you. Don't lie to yourself Lisa...they were getting tired of you that's why you left...that's why it was time." It can get pretty ugly....those lying arrows can hit your heart and make a mess if you let them. NOW, I knew exactly what they were...lies. Did you know that these arrows are deliberately sent by the enemy and intentionally aimed at the spot they can cause most damage? Usually targeted in the area in which are mind is not renewed by the Word -- like an area where we are still losing our temper, or where we are still easily offended, or and area of rebellion or fear (which is most likely where my weak spot is located). Good news...Eph. 6 reminds us that we have a shield of faith that will extinguish all the flaming arrows. That shield is strengthened by believing His Word. He will deliver us!!

So I've been focused on saturating my mind on His Word.  My time with the Lord has been me asking Him to renew my mind to such an extent that I have more faith in His Word than in what I see or hear. You see faith is not a tool to manipulate God into giving you something you want, it is simply the means by which we accept what God has already made available. So...while I'm running here and there, feeling a little lost, this morning I found myself running right under the wings of my Father. "He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart."

This morning, by surprise or maybe not, I opened my door to a field full of chickens, cows and horses. I thought of a babe chick and how it runs under its Mama's wings to find shelter. Mama doesn't run after all of her chicks...they come to her. You see the Lord is always there, we are the ones that run around fearful looking for shelter...He is just right there...open arms..ready to shelter us and renew us to do the next thing.

God has shown me, as I opened my car door this morning, that I have found my family, in fact I felt like the Lord said..."Hold on Lisa, My faithfulness knows no boundaries, there are no doors to be open, I've opened all the doors and you are home now."  I know I'm going to experience something amazing, something that the deepest part of my heart has longed for for a long time. Home, a home without walls or doors, a place open for new things, new people, new experiences. I'm at point B, I've not left there, and I'm happy to be there...but what I was searching for is not found in any "point" at all. God has shown me, that the gifts that He gave me, He has given me so He can use them, where He wants to use them, when He wants to use them. He hasn't stripped me of them. So...I will stay in His shelter and rest in His shadow..and enjoy my new wide open home.

I Can't See You!

"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." Psalms 139:7-10

Have you ever felt like there are times in your life where you are super strong for God and then other times you feel like He has left you and you are running for your life? Crazy right? Those are the very feelings we see in David after he conquers Goliath. I recently heard a pastor tell the story again and so I went and reread the story of David and Goliath and I wanted to share what I learned from his sermon. So powerful!! You know, this young man, running towards this giant..all David has is a rock and a sling but he is running strong because God is with him and he knows it. He kills the giant, runs up and takes Goliath's sword and cuts off his head. Feeling pretty amazing at that moment. (Think about those moments in your life...those are powerful moments!)

Four chapters later, David feels like he is all alone, he finds himself going to the priest, so discouraged, running for his life, so alone, and just wants to see if the priest has anything for him.  Perhaps you've felt like this...even after a moment like the one above. We are a peculiar people. :)

The priest them shows him the very sword that years earlier young David had used in one of the greatest, most amazing battles in history.  "The priest replied, “The sword of Goliath the Philistine, whom you killed in the Valley of Elah, is here; it is wrapped in a cloth behind the ephod. If you want it, take it; there is no sword here but that one.” David said, “There is none like it; give it to me.” 1 Samuel 21:9

David first gets the sword when he conquers Goliath.  Four chapters later he feels like God has abandoned him, he's running for his life from Saul, he runs to the priest and what's waiting for him there? The same sword. 

God's promises are available whether you are running towards him or away from him because its not based on your performance. It is based upon a God who will ultimately fulfill all of His promises! (Remember David was anointed as a young boy by Samuel...he was anointed to be KING!)

The difference between those 2 stories of David was his awareness of God's presence. Because God's presence changes everything.

One of the greatest promises God gives us is His presence. If we are children of God, He IS always with us. That's the verse at the top...David in a moment of solitude, writes that verse because he realizes...that God is always with him...He's everywhere!

When things don't go as we imagine they should we think that God isn't fulfilling his promises for us. That's only because we can't see it. His presence is in us that means his promises are all available to us. Are you aware of God's presence in your life?

You may not see it, but you can always find it! Listen, God's promises are at times hard to see...but they are always available. The picture above is my boy Kyle when he was probably 4 years old. He wore that batman mask for a whole year. He thought that as long as he wore that mask nobody could see him. We would play hide-and-seek and he would hide in the open space and believe that he couldn't be seen. We would go along and say..."Where's Kyle?" "Hmmm? I can't see Kyle!" (meanwhile he is right in front of us!) and he would giggle so we would hear him and say..."OH I found you!!"

This is just how we are with God sometimes. God is right in front of us, we know his promises are there, but we can't see Him. We take the circumstances of life put it right in front of our eyes and block out the presence of God and his promises. We take the doctors report that we got and we put it right in front of our eyes and we ask God, why did you leave me, why is this going on, where are you, why is this happening to me? Or maybe we see our children are running crazy and not turning out they way you hoped and you say, where did I fail, why is this happening? What we don't realize is that God is right there...right there...something is obstructing our view because He's always been right in front of us...we might not always see it because these things in our lives can seem enormous, but we can always find it! 

I think that is how David may have felt in that story. When we find him going to the priest he probably felt like the Lord had abandoned him..."God's blessing everybody else, but not me". Then the priest shows him this sword...this sword that brought David's mind back to that battlefield and was able to remove the thing that was obstructing his view and he started to remember God's past faithfulness. It's like that "AHA!" moment.

He starts to relive that moment and remembers God's faithfulness, and maybe that opened up his mind to remember the times when he was tending sheep and killed a lion or bear with his hands because God always protected him or even before that, he may remember the oil being poured down his head and face as God anointed him to be king. Then He began to feel the presence of God...it never really left him, it was always in him, but he let the circumstances of his life overwhelm him and he forgot about God's past faithfulness and His promises!

If you want to start claiming God's promises for your future...start remember his past faithfulness in your life! Thinking on His faithfulness, brings us right back into the reality of His presence. Can you remember where God provided? Where God healed? Where God showed up and made something out of nothing. If you are alone today, can you remember a time when you felt God's presence comfort your weary soul. You begin finding God's promises when you remember what He has already done!


God has never failed to fulfill one promise in His word..he is not going to start with you. Faith is looking what He has done in the past, knowing that he will do it in the present and believing that he will always accomplish it in His future! The Word of God is filled with his promises!

God responds to us is much like the priest in the story above...If you want it take it! God's promises do not come with expiration date.  

2 Corinthians 1:20  ^"For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God."

What do you need today, because God's promises are available to you! Find it is His Word and write it down, put it on your refrigerator, write it on the bathroom mirror! Keep it in front of your eyes!

What is your response to God? Perhaps it will be like David in the scripture above: "Give it to me!" It requires an action. A present only becomes useful after it is opened. A sword only becomes a weapon after you pick it up and use it.  A promise can't be earned but it can be embraced. An unclaimed promise is a forfeited blessing. Listen God's word becomes active when we apply to our lives!

What promise are you believing God has for you today? Let me know!

Nothing!

I absolutely LOVE the Word of God. Romans 8:38-39 is a powerful scripture that reminds us that there is NOTHING that can separate us from the LOVE of God. Too many people feel like they've done way too much for God to ever give them a second chance, or that they've used up all of their "2nd chances"! I think the Message Bible puts this scripture in just the right way...for everyone to understand what it is saying. So, I've simply copied this scripture from the Message for you and I to read:

So, what do you think? 

With God on our side like this, how can we lose?

If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us? 

And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen? 

Who would dare even to point a finger? 

The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. 

Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! 

Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture: 

They kill us in cold blood because they hate you. We’re sitting ducks; they pick us off one by one. None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. 

I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.

Powerful right? You shouldn't have any doubts about whatever situation you are in...He's not letting go of you...at all! Nothing is going to get in His way of LOVING you and me!

OH how He loves us & NOTHING is going to hold Him back!

My Second Chance

Yesterday was an incredible day. November isn't just the month I remember to give thanks, but yesterday is going to be a memorable beginning to our "Thanksgiving Season".

I realize that according to my blog counter my audience is minimal, approximate 80-100 hits a day when I post a blog and about 10-20 random hits throughout the weeks I don't post. OK..so I know that isn't that much, but a comment on my Facebook page in relation to the events of yesterday made me think it could possible help someone else if I described my experience. Someone had said that she wondered what might happen if a person was stung by a bee/wasp and went into anaphylactic shock or experienced anaphylactic symptoms and they didn't have an epi-pen. Well, I'm gonna share just what your experience could be like. Also, I talked with a friend on the phone last night who sadly, when she was younger watched her grandfather get stung by a bee, and die. They lived a bit away from the hospital and the ambulance didn't get there in time. This really could be very serious.

I want to preface all of this by giving glory to God. For as long as I can remember, I have had an irrational fear of bees. I even went for therapy - no kidding. You have to know, I couldn't even look at the page in my Charlie Brown Encyclopedia when I was 6 years old because there was a bee hive on the "B" page. I eventually ripped that page right out of my book. Not much has changed since then. I quit therapy after she told me I was going to have to encounter a bee eventually to get over this fear - I told her she needed therapy if she thought that would ever happen.(Well, I didn't actually speak that out loud, I just never rescheduled my appointments) I know I shouldn't have been fearful. I know perfect love casts out all fear. I know that the Lord doesn't give us a spirit of fear. OH I have heard it from so many people...just get over it. Well, today I'm not so sure it was a fear or just a little sensitivity to what my spirit man has known all these 44 years of my life. Thank you Lord! So...I never messed with bees. I never swatted them away, ok...sometimes I acted in some irrational ways (not from God I'm sure), but I did try to be brave for my kids. (I emphasize try!) OK...now...my experience:

There I was, sitting with friends at the park as our children played. Two diet sodas sitting behind us might have been the attraction to the local bees or (in my opinion based on my insentient reading up on it...I think it was a wasp). At any rate, after I felt a little tickle on my neck which I originally brushed off thinking it was just my hair, I felt it again (not hearing any buzzing) I honestly didn't think it was anything, until this burning, kind of numbing sensation was going up the side of my neck and down my shoulder. I got up and said, I think something bit me. I saw an ant on the ground and stepped on it and thought well, maybe it was that ant. Then as the pain was getting worse, I walked over to the side of the table and spotted a large yellow (bee/wasp) circling the diet coke. I don't think it registered until my friend said, "Wow, you have this rash going all the way up your neck and it looks like it is spreading." The pain was spreading to my ear and my head and I was having difficulty swallowing.

This all happened so fast. I fell to my knees, and tried to drink water. I could only get a tiny bit down and the rest started to pour out of my mouth. I was embarrassed. All my friends were surrounding me and I was dribbling water from my mouth. Nice Lisa! I started not being able to breathe and this is when I started to panic. By the way, you shouldn't panic it only makes things worse. If any of my readers figure out how to do this while your throat and lungs are expanding and you are not able to breath...please post a comment and let me know. :)

Here is where I'm so thankful that I have friends who do not listen to me. It's a theme in my life..but yesterday it came in handy. I was given benedryl three times..I thought to myself, OK, as soon as this benedryl kicks in you will be fine. Because I'm allergic to mosquitoes I know that benedryl works. My allergy to mosquitoes is usually just swelling in the sight, but at times when I've been bitten several times, I might have a little bit of a hard time swallowing. Very mild and benedryl does the trick. When my friends were insisting that we call 911 I was adamantly against it. I didn't want to make a fuss. Seriously, was sure I would be able to breathe at some point once that "fast acting melt in your mouth" benedryl kicked in.

Now, I'm sure I was a sight. Inside, I was terrified. I couldn't breath, I couldn't swallow and my boys where probably watching at this point. My 10 year old is already going through this phase of "Mom you're not going to die right?" All of this is going through my mind. My one friend was an ER Nurse and her daughter just happened to have gone through this a few weeks ago. She recognized the symptoms. Against my wishes, another friend called 911. I told them all..."JUST PRAY FIRST"! They did, but apparently while I was trying to grasp for air and she was praying over me...she signaled to my other friend to CALL 911. (SO THANKFUL I WAS NOT ALONE!)

Besides this rash/hive that was spreading up my neck and down my chest, I was struggling to take a breath, I felt like I was going to vomit and I surely felt like I was going to pass out. They convinced me that it was necessary for the ambulance to come, so I let them walk me back to the picnic tables. I remember going in and out like I was falling asleep or something. I couldn't keep my head up. That is when my nurse friend brought out her epi-pen. So much was going through my mind. Remember, I've never been stung before so I didn't realize what was going on in my body. My chest felt so tight, like an elephant was sitting on it, at one point I thought I might be having a heart attack. (I've never had one of those either). whew! :) So when she came at me with that epi-pen I freaked out. She said the only symptom would be rapid heart beat. NO WAY. I was NOT going to let my heart beat any faster...I was sure I was going to die. She was not happy with me and I know she secretly hoped I was going to just pass out already. (she told me so)...so she could have her chance to try and save my life the best way she knew how.

The paramedics arrived and gave me some sort of breathing treatment and oxygen and proceeded to put me in the ambulance. My blood pressure was 210/128 and my oxygen levels were way low. It was clearly an emergency. The paramedic said that he had heard that I would prefer not going to the hospital, he said he had no choice that this was more serious and I needed to go. While he was trying to put IVs in me...he was having a hard time finding a vein. He looks at me...face to face...as he was sitting on my legs and says this..."today is a day of second chances...you're friends were right to call...you could have very well died!"

Well, I didn't. In fact within the two hours of medication taking affect, I was able to breathe freely. My blood pressure went down to 115/77 (normal for me) and my Oxygen was 96. So all was good! My chest, even this morning hurts a bit, like a bruised feeling. I have my epi-pens (which by the way...are VERY EXPENSIVE! Ouch! But VERY NECESSARY. I'm going to trust God with the finances as I don't have insurance. But trusting God is easy after all the stones we have piled up over the years...it is easy to see just how many second chances God truly gives His children!

Wanted to end this long post with a picture that my friend sent to me. After they whisked me away she snapped a picture of the 35 or so children just gathering all over the pavilion in the park to pray for me out loud - all on their own - without adult prompting or supervision. My children told me all about it. Prayers of faith rising up from children's hearts. I know that made the Lord so proud. Every single one of those Moms and Dads I'm sure are also proud that their children are doers of the Word! To quote my son Shane's post of Facebook..."This was one of the most scary days of my life and the happiest days of my life. Scared that my Mom might die and happy because God healed her! I love that God does that!" Building a generation of prayer warriors and men/women of faith! Thank you Lord for starting this season of Thanksgiving with a reminder that you are a God of second chances!

What Do You Call An Old Chicken?

Well, if the word isn't out yet, it's going to be....I'm not a young chick anymore. Nope! I am in my mid-40s and I'd like to say it feels GREAT! However, as hard as I'm working on feeling great, exercising, getting fit...I can tell you...there is this force...and its working against me. I'm afraid its called Menopause.

OK...I'm not quite here yet:

However, I am on my way. Some call it....perimenopause. Great the red squiggly line for spell check underlines the word. I wish that if Webster didn't recognize it, we wouldn't have to either, but we do.

For 10 years I struggled with infertility. Why? Because I had two horrible hormonal issues called Poly cystic Ovarian Syndrome and endometriosis. I eventually had my babies, and became...."normal" or "regular" as we like to call it. I still have no thyroid as antibodies have been feasting on that since I received 8 blood transfusions when I lost over half my body's blood giving birth to my twins.  Lots of "forces" are working against my goals. As I rested today because I'm feeling...not so GREAT...I came to realize a few things and thought I would record them.

I really prayed today because I have two boys who are entering adolescence...and we been spotting some pre-puberty symptoms:  like crying for no reason, aches and pains in body, feelings getting hurt very easily, worrisome, sad or depressed feeling..blah!

My husband has been praying too. He knows that I've been experiencing symptoms like, crying for no reason, feeling sad or blah, forgetfulness, weird aches and pains, and with his vast knowledge now he knows them to be pre-menopausal.

Pray for my husband if you get a chance. If pre-puberty and pre-menopausal must live in harmony...it is going to take Divine Intervention.

 Ok...I am not a classic menopausal person. I'm not really moody or crazy, however I have noticed a few symptoms creeping into my life. In case you are wondering what the symptoms of perimenopause are or if you are not certain what that even is...let me share what I've learned.

Perimenopause, or menopause transition, is the stage of a woman's reproductive life that begins several years before menopause, when the ovaries gradually begin to produce less estrogen. It usually starts in a woman's 40s, but can start in a woman's 30s or even earlier. Perimenopause lasts up until menopause, the point when the ovaries stop releasing eggs (hence the chickens at the top). In the last one to two years of perimenopause, this decline in estrogen accelerates. At this stage, many women experience menopausal symptoms.

Some perimenopause symptoms are: hot flashes, breast tenderness, worsening PMS, decreased libido, fatigue, irregular periods, weight gain, vaginal dryness, urine leakage, urinary urgency, mood swings and difficulty sleeping. Seriously, don't you just feel sorry for women right now. At least by writing this down, I've found some joy...I'm not experiencing even half of these symptoms...but I've got some.

So here it is ladies (I'm sure any male readers dropped out way up at the top), its time to pull out the truth! I'm not in a race to get to my goals...I just want to get there at some time. The scale has been teasing me with its ups and downs. My body has been acting like it is old or tired or pregnant. (I'm not...I checked...I'm not kidding!)

I have to make a decision NOW before it gets really bad interesting. So, I've talked it over with the Lord..and here's our plan.

Regardless of what emotions are whirling around inside, by God's grace, I can choose to fix my mind on Him and, trust and obey. When I do this, I know that I will indeed experience His peace.

I will rely on His Word and promises: "I am with you always" (Matthew 28:20), "My God will meet all your needs" (Phil 4:19), "Though the mountains be shaken and hills removed, yet His unfailing love will not be" (Isaiah 54:10) "Give thanks in all circumstances" (1 Thess. 5:18). So many more that directly relate to those emotions (some I've already shared with my pre-pubescent boys).

Finally instead of dreading what is to come, I'm going to choose to understand that this is the way God made me. "You created my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother's womb, I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days (YES ALL OF THEM) ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be" Psalm 139.

So I'm not going to fight this. I'm going to keep going, keep trying to get fit and not be in a race about it. I'm not in my 20s or 30s anymore. I'm not a young "chick"! I'm hoping to keep a sense of humor and surround myself with other women that can keep me laughing! And when the time comes and I take up residence on Menopause Lane and I begin to experience more symptoms (which by the way, I'm already praying will pass  me by...why not...God can do all things)...I'm going to try to take each one with a good attitude. It's all about perspective right?

Anyway, we'll see when the time comes. Remember to pray for my family during all of this pre-stuff happening...especially for Mr. Incredible. I mean he is incredible...but we all have our limitations!

The Amazing & Divine Providence of God

Florida Storm on Saturday Night

A series of events have occurred in the past 24 hours, that no one can say it happened by chance. As my brainy boy heard me speaking with excitement the turn of events of the day...he says to me..."Mom, what does Providence mean anyway?" (Not afraid to ask..that is why he is so smart!) Let me start by explaining that Providence basically refers to God's continuous upholding the existence and natural or of the universe (you know He created it..causes it to spin on its axis...all of that!), likewise Divine Providence refers to God's direct and extraordinary intervention in the lives of people. So with that in mind...here is what happened in my life.

I have this brain (yes that has been confirmed in my MRI from 8 months ago), and it has a swollen something or other in it. Believe it or not I forget the technical name...(hope that's not a sign of anything...just kidding). Needless to say, I was told that my doctor wanted to keep an eye on it and have an MRI every six months.

An MRI at this particular place that my doctor sends me is $860. That is a large amount of money for someone who doesn't even make that in one month. However, the Lord did provide for me to get this done. This past Sunday a woman from my church approaches me and asks if I had ever be seen by a chiropractor, she works for one and knows many people who had severe headaches get some relief.

I have cluster headaches. "Cluster headaches occur in cyclical patterns or clusters — which gives the condition its name. Cluster headache is one of the most painful types of headache. Cluster headache is sometimes called the "alarm clock headache" because it commonly awakens you in the middle of the night with intense pain in or around the eye on one side of your head. Bouts of frequent attacks — known as cluster periods — may last from weeks to months, usually followed by remission periods when the headache attacks stop completely. During remission, no headaches occur for months and sometimes even years." I've experienced this intense pain for the past few years...typically hitting me in early September.

We don't think that the swollen vein in my brain has anything to do with my headaches, but since it reappeared so quickly, I didn't think pushing the MRI further back was wise. I had made the appointment for Thursday at 8:30am and the Lord provided the funds for me to have it done. As I told this woman from church that I was getting an MRI, she asked where I was having it done. I told her and she told me that there was another imaging center close by that might be less expensive...and still do the exact same scan. She would make a few phone calls for me.

Next morning she calls and says that indeed this new place can do the exact MRI for $300. Come to find out, one of my guitar student's Mom had her brain MRI done at this facility and they were able to save her from a life threatening problem. The place is reputable, and is used all the time by this chiropractor that this woman works for. Just had to call my doctor and get the order transferred from one imaging center to the next. The office staff told me that they don't recommend that other facility. When asked why, they just said, they don't like working with them...so "No...we won't recommend them to you!" I felt a little bullied, so I called the friend from church and she said I should just call the imaging center and have them fax it to a new facility. I'm a self pay patient...I have rights! How could I in good conscience spend $860 when I could spend $300...I needed to be a good steward of what God has put in my trust.

Long story shortened just a tad. I was having such a hard time. While making all of these phone calls, I had a precious little girl here who had chosen to spend the morning of her birthday with me. She wanted to make cookies with Ms. Lisa...on her birthday. My heart was breaking because  my time with her was being interrupted with phone calls to people unwilling to help me change my appointment. I was hitting a brick wall. "We don't do that?" "We won't do that?" "We don't recommend this!" I finally called my friend and just said, in tears..."I need to walk away from this for 30 minutes. I've canceled my MRI, but I need to put cookies in the oven with this little girl...priorities after all!"  She said not to worry, walk away from it for a while and make cookies.

A few hours later, she called back and said she had called a friend at the new imaging center, they had my order faxed over and in fact the nurse at the new center was going to go pick up a copy of my last MRI from the previous center on her way to work in the morning. All I had to do was wait for a phone call to schedule my new MRI. Five minutes later I get a call from the new imaging center, confirming that it will cost $300 at the time of visit and I could have an appointment for this Thursday at 8:00am. (Almost the exact same time as my other appointment).

The one detail I forgot to mention was that for about a month now my car has been having issues starting. I would have to turn the ignition for about 3 minutes before it would actually start. I knew the starter was going, but couldn't afford to get it fixed, so just kept ignoring it and praying it would last until Mike got a nursing job. This particular morning, I knew that a special young lady had chosen to spend some of her momentous day with me and so I got up early to go buy her a festive birthday balloon. My car wouldn't start...at all! It finally stopped working. On the very day that the Lord saw fit to save me $560 of which now I have money to pay for my car to be fix. PROVIDENCE - extraordinary intervention in the lives of people.

How do we forget that He loves us that much? Saving money so I don't have to go into debt...is important to my Father God because its important to me. The course of events played out in the exact right time and order. Had my car broken down a week ago, I wouldn't have had the money to pay for it to get fixed. Small details...maybe...coincidence...definitely NOT! Divine Providence....absolutely!

Romans 11:33-36 says it best...and I'm using the Message, just because it is so much fun...

Have you ever come on anything quite like this extravagant generosity of God, this deep, deep wisdom?

It's way over our heads. We'll never figure it out. 

Is there anyone around who can explain God?

Anyone smart enough to tell Him what to do?

Anyone who has done Him such a huge favor that God has to ask His advice?

Everything comes from Him;

Everything happens through Him;

Everything ends up in Him.

Always glory! Always praise!

 Yes. Yes. Yes.

Miracles Are Possible

Mike Engel, receiving his pin for nursing!

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5

I don't believe I've told this story from the beginning. Today is a very special day. It is the fulfillment of part of a journey that was destined by God...because His Word is true...apart from Him, we can do nothing.

Outside the New Journal Center before graduation

My husband has a BA in History Education....but did not like teaching...at all! As a former public educator myself, I'm proud of my husband for leaving education...we don't really need more teachers in the system who don't like their job. So he started working with coffee...with the hopes of maybe owning his own Coffee House. Mike had worked for Starbucks in management...(yes that is where the addiction for good coffee started) for 10 years. In fact when we moved to Florida the company transferred him to a store in Ormond Beach. It wasn't long until the top paid management figured out that Mike was still making his NJ salary but living in FL ...and he was capped out and experienced a cut in pay. He would never make enough money to raise a family of 5 on Starbucks salary. So when one of his customers handed him a business card and told him that he would be a great addition to his company...Mike took the chance to do something different. He became a sales representative for medical equipment and surgical supplies.

The weather was incredible...like a tropical storm just during the graduation!

He actually loved learning about what he was selling and thoroughly enjoyed being in the Operating Room and talking to the surgeons. This invigorated him...far more than closing a deal. Sales, just was not his thing. His company had a freeze and he was let go. So thankful for this opportunity. After that, it was one job after another. Each one however, taking something and learning from each situation. All the while, Pop's dementia was increasing and he was requiring so much more care. I did what I could while schooling my children, but it finally had gotten the best of me and Pop would only respond to Mike. It was then his family decided that they would compensate Mike to be Pop's sole caregiver so that we could still make a living (albeit meager). Mike did this tirelessly for over a year.

The only man that participated in graduation. The last to light his candle, the last to receive his pin...he said he was the  exclamation point! Here they are reading the Florence Nightingale Pledge.

Then something happened. I won't go into the details, but suffice to say that in the midst of this terrible circumstance that the Enemy was trying to throw in my husband's face....God made something beautiful.

We were at a point where we thought we might lose our home. Pop was placed in a nursing home (best thing for him) but unless my husband could find full time work, there was a possibility we might not have a place to live.  I calculated that we needed at the very least just for living expenses...$32,000. So I began to PRAY BIG! Only God could do this...with man this would be impossible...with God all things are possible. I had no idea what the next day would bring.

We couldn't be more proud of him at this moment! He has worked hard and given God all the Glory!

It brought a letter from Daytona State College saying that Mike was accepted into the LPN program. He had taken the prerequisites for the RN program and had applied, but because they transferred over all of his grades from 18 years ago when he was in college...they transferred over some lower ones that didn't calculate to a high enough GPA (ironically enough that class he received a low grade in wasn't even a class he needed...it was all a numbers game). Even though he had straight "A" as DSC, his GPA was shy by a few points. We had no idea he would even be accepted into the LPN. The timing couldn't have been..."worse". There was no way, he could go to school now...in order for us to survive...he needed to work. I was determined to see what God would do. So we prayed.

This journey would have been far more challenging without the love and support of so many friends. These are two special friends that joined us for Mike's graduation. I know Mike would have wanted his Mom to be there, I was so touched that these two braved the storm and cheered him on...it made it so special!

I received a phone call the day after this letter came into the mail from a friend who lived in a different state. She said she was saving up some money to send for my boys and I for a summer vacation..but felt like the Lord was prompting her to send the money for Mike to go to school. It was $750 dollars. I remember her saying that it wasn't much and we both prayed that if this was God's will, that Mike go to school, then he would multiply it. Only she, myself and God were privy to our prayers that day. I told her that I wouldn't say a word to Mike that we would just pray. She sent the check.

We celebrated with a Thai dinner at my favorite Thai restaurant in Daytona! YUM!  Do you see Dave's plate?  Wait keep reading...

The very next day I received another phone call, from a couple who had inherited an investment. They called to say that they had an opportunity to have a check cut, to roll it over or reinvest it...they decided that the Lord put it on their hearts to reinvest it...they knew a guy who would make a great nurse someday...they were investing in the work of the Lord that someday, I believe, my husband will be a part of. That $750 multiplied and grew to $20,750. When my husband came home that day after I had received that phone call, I sat him down along with my children and told him what had happened. We all held hands, we were so humbled, we were witnessing God's miraculous and mighty hand...and have continued to witness his miracles. Five loaves and two fish...pretty much sums up how we've lived. We continued to be faithful to the Lord giving back to Him and giving to others sacrificially. You see, you can never out give God!

"And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen. Philippians 4:19

Only by the pure Grace of God is my husband walking up to receive his pin today. Someone told us recently that Mike did it..against all odds. We tell you today...with Christ the odds are always in our favor. My children have been so fortunate to watch their Dad study hard and give 100% to everything, the Lord, family, work, school...and it has paid off. "Everything you do..do as unto the Lord"

Mike Engel...I am proud of you! We look forward to what God has in store for all of us. Make no mistake...He has got a plan..and its a good one.

Remember when you think that there is no way...if it is His will...He will make a way..."With God all things are possible!"

Pineapple Fried Rice with Shrimp! Beautiful & Delicious!